Archive for the ‘wellbeing’ Category
London and Brighton confidence skills. Confidence tricks 12 – The Ring of Confidence & the Power of Communication
London and Brighton Confidence Boosting skills workshops
Voice, confidence & presentation coaching with Alan Mars
London singing lessons
Brighton Hove singing lessons
LIBERATING VOICE & CONFIDENCE FOR PERFORMANCE
Most singers experience some anxiety at the prospect of performing or auditioning. For some the nerves can be completely debilitating. Celtic harp player and traditional singer Alan Mars suggests some simple methods for transforming stress and anxiety into confidence and excitement.
The techniques are drawn from the author’s extended training in singing, Alexander Technique, NLP and presentation skills training
NERVE ENDINGS & THE RING OF CONFIDENCE
The performing world is full of remedies for nerves, from the lucky rabbits foot (not so lucky for the rabbit perhaps) to Luciano Pavarotti’s gracefully flourished handkerchief! Ultimately, the luckiest charm you have is a harmonious relationship between mind, body and voice.
A little adrenaline can be the fuel that turns a merely adequate performance into an exhilarating experience for both singer and audience. But what can you do if you have rehearsed your material thoroughly and you still feel the kind of anxiety that turns performance into panic?
THE “OUR SONG” PHENOMENON
Many couples have experienced the phenomenon of “our song”. During the courting phase they had a favourite song. Hearing that song, even decades later, can bring the feelings, images and sounds associated with that time flooding back.
Similarly, for many people, the mere thought of performing in public can spark off feelings of confidence and resourcefulness or terror and abject misery. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? The trick, of course, is to have your very best experiences of confidence and competence powerfully associated with the thought of the venue within which you are going to perform. How is this done? Nothing could be simpler!
LIBERATING YOUR BODY AND YOUR VOICE- IN REHEARSAL!
EXPERIMENT 1) Vocalising from restriction
Think of a time when you were feeling a bit pressured and restricted. Remember this as fully as possible… what you were seeing around you, what you were hearing and also what you were feeling… Stay fully in this state for a while longer.
Now look around the room, does it look any less bright or any less friendly than before? Now walk around the room. Do you feel taller or shorter? Do you feel wider or narrower? What size does your “personal space” seem to be (indicate with your hands)? Is your walking lighter or heavier?
Vocalise an ah sound. Sing a line or two of a song. How easy or difficult was it to vocalise?
EXPERIMENT 2) Vocalising from ease
Move around the room and stretch to dissipate the effects of the last experiment.
Remember a time when you felt “on top of the world”. Recall and relive this experience… what you were seeing, hearing and feeling…. stay fully in this state a while longer and allow yourself to take two or three easy, deep breaths with the emphasis on the outbreath. Allow this feeling to spread through your entire body…..
Look around the room again. Is it any brighter or friendlier now? Walk around the room. Do you feel shorter or taller? Narrower or wider? How large is your “personal space” now? Is your walking heavier or lighter?
Vocalise an ah sound. Sing a little. Notice how your voice feels and sounds different from the first experiment.
You have just taken the first step in freeing your body and liberating your voice! Which of the two states would you prefer to perform in?
The above experiment demonstrates that, as far as our muscles are concerned, the difference between thinking about a particular event and actually doing it is only a matter of degree.
When I run performance workshops many participants tell me that the room looks more friendly and welcoming after doing the second part of this exercise. This reminds me of the old cartoon series “The Gambols”. One of the characters, George, is portrayed in a variety of moods as he responds to the ups and downs of life. When life is going badly there is a grey or black cloud above his head. This is accompanied by an appropriately sagging posture.
When George is on a high, there is a puffy white cloud above his head or a kind of halo radiating light. This is accompanied by a confident posture, bright eyes and a smile. What this demonstrates so well, as many cartoons do, is that the state we are in at any given moment affects the way that we respond to the pressures of daily life- including any performance activity.
Many cartoons also seem to express the belief that the cartoon characters (and by implication, ourselves) are at the mercy of circumstances. It is possible, however, to stabilise your best physical, mental and emotional states, so that you approach performances with a peak performance state literally at your fingertips…
THE RING OF CONFIDENCE
Fully recall and re-live a focused and easy state by seeing , hearing and feeling it again. As you begin to slide into your focused state, gently link the tips of your forefinger and thumb together. Keep your fingers linked for 10 to 15 seconds. You are now beginning to link or “anchor” your resourceful state to your fingertips.
Once is not enough? Strengthen and reinforce your anchor by repeating the above process three times.
Simply linking your thumb and forefinger will now be sufficient stimulus to take you the critical first few steps into your confident and focused state- a very useful thing to do when waiting for your turn in a competition.
“…I use certain tricks that make me feel more secure. Everybody knows about my white handkerchief, which I used in my first concert in Missouri in 1973, in case I started to perspire… I feel much better if I have it out there with me. It has a function but it’s also for good luck.”
Luciano Pavarotti- My Life
VISUAL ANCHORS
Many different concert halls and audition rooms share similar characteristics e.g. exit signs, furniture, instruments of different types etc.
Get yourself into a resourceful state by using the fingertip “ring of confidence”. As your state changes visualise the furniture, the instruments and the general room layout. Repeat three times.
This will help you to anchor your most confident states to the appropriate context. If you can do this “live” in the venue, before you perform, so much the better.
EVOCATIVE ODOURS
Smells are very powerful. The smell of apple [1] blossom, for example, can virtually transport some people back to childhood, playing in an orchard.
Radio 4 recently reviewed techniques that help actors overcome stage fright. The performer first creates a state of poised relaxation and then sniffs a handkerchief impregnated with aromatherapy oils that encourage even deeper calmness and focus. They then strategically place the handkerchief on their costume just before they go on stage. The odour of the aromatherapy oils then triggers the state of poised relaxation. So there may be more to Pavarotti’s handkerchief than meets the eye!
Imagine your favourite aroma. Breathe it in gently and deeply and let it go with a whispered ah sound. Anchor your peak state to this aroma. Use this technique before performing.
DRIVING THE CAR
Instead of getting into the car and immediately rushing off to do battle with the rest of the traffic…
Pause and place your attention in your physical centre of gravity (just below your belt buckle); extend a strong positive feeling to the world around you; adjust your driving seat; your mirrors; keys in the ignition and your hands on the steering wheel.
This will anchor the touch of the steering wheel to a safer driving state and will ensure that you arrive at work, the interview, the sales appointment etc. in a happier and more efficient state!
POSITIVE FEELINGS
This is perhaps the simplest and most powerful self-management technique of them all. Radiate a strong positive feeling from the core of your self. Cast the “net” of your positive feeling over the whole venue including your audience.
BUT I STILL FEEL NERVOUS!
The point of anchoring is not to stop butterflies in the stomach- the point is to get the butterflies to fly in formation. Adrenaline can give you the critical edge that takes you over the threshold into performance excellence. Adrenaline means that you care.
The attitude behind anchoring, I believe, is of greater importance than any anchoring exercise itself. When I ask people about this they say it is to do with a quality of self belief- “I have a choice”; “I have control over my response patterns” ; “I can learn from all situations.” etc.
REACHING HARMONY- THE INTEGRATED ANCHOR
Much of what is written above is drawn from the field of sports psychology (national and local sports teams please take note!) and, more recently, from the field of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)- a study of, amongst other things, the structure of excellent performance.
Our best and easiest performances happen when conscious and unconscious are working in harmony. This is like watching two excellent dance partners waltzing. They make it all look and feel oh so easy and flowing. But as you look at them you realize that such skill required repetition, communication and time.
After a while your peak performance states become the new normal- you are no longer walking in the foothills, you are becoming acclimatised to the higher slopes. The higher slopes allow you to glimpse unknown and perhaps unsuspected lands of mental, physical and vocal excellence…
Semi-Supine Alexander Technique Youtube video- Confidence Tricks 11
Semi-supine Alexander Technique active resting position
The semi-supine active resting position gives optimum support to your whole back – and to your spine in particular Alexander Technique teachers recommend it as a daily practice. Do it once a day if possible for up to twenty minutes. As well as easing your posture it is particularly calming and centering. Youtube video clips, picture and written instructions are below…
It only requires a firm and warm surface, such as a blanket on the floor, and a few paperback books to serve as a headrest. It will help you to let go of excessive muscular tension in your body as a whole. It allows your torso to widen and your spine to release into its optimum resting length. It eases and reduces pressure on the inter-vertebral discs by placing the spine in a position of maximum mechanical support.
Most people need somewhere between 1 – 3 inches of books underneath the back of the skull. The head-rest encourages release in the muscles that join the back of the neck to the base of your skull. It should be neither too high (or your chin will compress your throat) nor too low (or your chin will stick up in the air). This gives maximum support to your spine. Your feet are flat on the floor, knees pointing up to the ceiling about shoulder-width apart and your hands can rest gently on your torso. It’s the ideal pre-cursor to some voice-work. No wonder my ex-drama students continue to practice it daily decades after being introduced to it!
Over the next ten minutes or so you will simply develop your relationship to the floor and head rest… Imagine the four ‘corners’ of your back–head, shoulders and tail bone– spreading and lengthening and widening away from each other and on to the floor. Let go of trying and forcing. Let it be effortless. Leave it up to gravity and muscular release. Look at the video several times to get a general idea of how to get into the semi-supine position. The main thing to remember about getting into the semi-supine position is to do it mindfully, quite slowly and with awareness. The same thing goes for returning to your feet again. I’ll go into a bit more detail in future postings.
http://alphainventions.com/
http://thetechnique.co.uk/
http://alexandervoiceworks.com/
http://twitter.com/AlexTechVoice
http://celtic-cadences.blog.co.uk/
Semi-supine Alexander Technique active resting position
The Lychen Choir!
Singing, Health & Happiness – Confidence Tricks 6
When we think of the word “health” we may also think of “happiness”. And from happiness it is a short leap of the imagination to song and celebration. And just as happiness can lead to song, so also can singing can chase away the blues at the beginning, middle or the end of the day. It re-establishes a full, easy pattern of breathing and encourages release of the muscular system, with all the attendant benefits of stress alleviation. It is a way of expressing your feelings and of linking up with other people and the world around you.
Unfortunately for some people the idea of singing is not a cause for celebration. Many people have been given negative messages at an early age, often from teachers and parents, about their apparent inability to sing. This may have happened publicly. The resulting embarrassment virtually guaranteed that the child would no longer be able to sing, thus creating a self fulfilling prophecy. The effect of these negative messages persists into adult life. During family and seasonal celebrations, when others are singing, the wounded singer holds their breath and clamps their teeth or soundlessly mimes the words.
Sound familiar? Take heart- help is just around the corner! Remember this: we are all born singers! Most people assume that the speaking voice comes first and then we build a singing voice on top of it. The reverse is true- singing comes first and then we learn to speak. For more of this article please click here…
Related Articles:
Alexander Technique & the Choral Singer
The Lychen Choir – a growing collection of community singing with lyrics and MP3 soundfiles
Confidence Tricks 4
All Eyes on Me?
Speaking in public? All the attention moving in your direction? Feeling over-scrutinised? Uncomfortable?
1. Use the William Shakespeare Zen koan. Say these words silently or aloud…
“All the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players”
Point, literally or metaphorically, to the whole world around you. Point to all the men and women around you. Realise that they are all actors. All players.
Tell yourself that you are the audience. An audience of one. You’ve paid your money, you have your ticket and you are positively expected to be curious. So centre yourself and feel comfortable about gently observing, about positively scrutinising men and women, the players in front of you here and now.
2. Recite again…
“All the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players”
This time include yourself. You also are one of the men and women. You are one of the players.
Understand, feel or simply believe that there is no audience. Only a cast of millions improvising perfectly. No separation.
Try it. It’s a wonderful, if slightly scary, perspective.
Confidence Tricks 3. Agents Showcase – The Big Audition
The cast of final term drama students are reciting in unison. At least that is the idea. The sound is flat and ragged. Stressed or disengaged expressions are plain to see on the performers faces. Strain and slump in the postures. Tomorrow is an important evening for everyone’s future. An audience of theatrical agents. Careers could be made… or fizzle out before they start. You can almost see the thought bubbles – “Why do final rehearsals so often end up like this?”
What is happening here? Anxiety? Yes, in varying degrees from person to person. Tiredness and a feeling of not being quite equal to the task? The final term has been a long haul. Conflict of priorities? Time devoted to the ensemble piece is time subtracted from the all important solo slot. Despite the fact that the ensemble pieces are like the rich dark velvet that shows off the individual pieces of jewellery to best effect.
What to do? A good old fashioned motivational speech and then push on? It can work wonders… but not today, not now. The director decides – now is the time for pausing. For regrouping and redirecting the considerable individual and collective resources of the cast.
“Alright everyone! Take five!” A collective sigh of relief. Pursuit of other, small but important, goals ensues. A visit to the ladies or gents. A quick call on the mobile. Smokers huddle at the main entrance. Catch up on some gossip. Some are resting in the Alexander semi-supine position. Some sits and thinks. And some just sits.
We all have an actual need for distraction. A need to place attention elsewhere periodically. Too much work and not enough play etc.
“O.K. everyone, let’s get going again!”
Do they dive straight into the unison speech? No.
For the next ten minutes the students separate out into pairs. One of the students, the tester, starts to gently push the other student, the testee, who becomes wobbly and loses balance. After a short pause the testee places their hand briefly over their lower abdomen and then, returning their hand to their side, stands in a neutral posture. The tester begins to gently push again. This time the testee is stable and not only confidently balanced but looking calmer and more collected.
After swapping roles and repeating the same procedure the attitude in the cast is calmer, more powerful and motivation is high. Unison descends on the cast – the collective voice, like peeling bells, is now bright, clear and resonant.
The performance the following evening, both the ensemble and the individual pieces, is a resounding success. Students get agents and take the next step of their career.
Confidence Tricks 2. Festina Lente – Hasten Slowly
Festina Lente – Hasten Slowly
A potential student approaches a famous Japanese sword master asking for instruction.
The student asks how long it will take for him to achieve mastery in swordwork…
“It will take ten years for you to become competent in the basic skills” the master replied.
“What if I study twice as hard?” the student asks eagerly.
“Then it will take you twenty years!”
“And if I study three times as hard?”
“Thirty years! A pupil in such a hurry learns slowly.”
Confidence Tricks 1 – the Dating Game
“No! You may not call me a “Confidence Guru!” Absolutely not!” – Alan.
“But “Guru” is an extremely respectable term in media circles!” – Television producer.
“That’s as may be but my fellow regulars at the Red Lion will take the… will mock me mercilessly if they hear!” – Alan
“How about “Confidence Coach” then?” – television producer.
“Ok” sigh…
“Ok then” sigh… “Let me introduce you to the “datees” in the Green Room”
I’d been asked by a television production company to help coach some members of the public for live television. It was a dating programme. Interestingly most of the participants were in their late forties or early fifties. The usual participants were in their teens and twenties.
The “datees” would say a bit about their life, their loves, hates and hobbies directly to camera. We sat at a cocktail bar where everyone had to deliver a chat-up line and come up with an appropriate and, hopefully, humorous response. And, oh yes, we all had to strut our stuff down the catwalk (steady tiger!)Nerve wracking, of course, especially if you are not used to being in the limelight.
I taught the participants some basic centering techniques. I’ll say a bit more about the background to some of these techniques in the near future:
- Place your attention in your centre of gravity – just a few inches below your navel.
- Distribute your body weight evenly onto the ground
- Maintain wide vision and wide shoulders
- Balance your head easily on top of your spine
In the end we only had time to rehearse one or two things. The participants could sense the potential of the techniques however. And this seemed to really motivate them to simply have fun in front of the camera. A virtuous cycle?
Not everyone got a date. But everyone had fun. What is it about that wonderful mixture of relaxation and excitement that seems to make the world sparkle with possibility?
One woman who was really quite shy and reserved in the Green Room absolutely blossomed on camera. She demonstrated a golf swing, her hobby, to the camera and very shortly thereafter an eligible gent phoned in with a request to get know her better!
The two interviewers were impressed. How come a group of men and women in their late forties and early fifties could be such fun on camera? Why were they so much less inhibited than the usual “datees” in their teens and twenties?
The centering techniques certainly seemed to help. Is it true that wisdom that comes with increasing maturity? And, perhaps, the ability not to take yourself too seriously? If so then it’s good news for all of us!
The interviewers were also somewhat sceptical. Couldn’t these acting techniques stop people from simply being themselves?
I simply quoted Shakespeare “All the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players”
And I might have added – we often end up playing a part that is unsatisfying and unsuitable. A part that someone else wrote for us. These centering techniques can give us the flexibility, courage and motivation to try out new behaviours. Not all of the techniques will be suitable all of the time. Some of them will be entirely suitable but may take a little time to get used to. Some of them will be absolutely bang-on or, as the old sherry advert used to say, “One instinctively knows when something is right!” and we will take to them like the proverbial duck to water.
PS I’ll be running an introduction to Confidence Tricks at the NLP One day conference on April 19th.
PPS Many of the centering techniques I teach come originally from my training in Ki-Aikido. They’ve grown and adapted with me. Here is a link for my old sparring partner Charles Harris. We did our yellow belt grading together more years ago than I care to remember. He is chief instructor now for one of the biggest Ki-Aikido clubs in London.
HOVE ESPLANADE
“What a horrible, great, huge, ugly expanse of tarmac! What a blot on the landscape!” I muttered to my partner on first encountering the promenade at Hove.
I’ve lived here for a few years now and have completely changed my position on this. Actually it’s an almost unique Alexander Technique resource. Where else can you encounter such a wide open and perfectly flat space that’s empty(ish) for the majority of the day?
Here are some photo links in in mybrightonandhove.org.uk to give you the idea. I particularly like the old photo at the foot of the page. Have a look also at the contributory quotes by Mick Gates and Jackie Collins about their joy in this wonderful open space.
This is a game I like to play – Walking with my eyes closed… I estimate how far I can walk without bumping into a person, a dog or a building. I close my eyes. Slow down. Feel the ground underneath. Sense the sky above. Be aware of the space behind and to the sides. Lengthen and widen into the space above, below and around.
Open the eyes and transfer the same spatial awareness into eyes-open walking.
I’ve treated my partner and my daughters’ to the experience. A gentle hand on the elbow and I become their trusty guide-dog. Lovely on a sunny winter’s day or on a starry, windy, cloud scudding winter’s night.
I’m counting my blessings right now!
These Foots Were Made for Walkin’
I’ve just realised that most of my Alexander Technique blog musings have been done whilst walking. I absolutely love walking. I did a Google search for quotes about walking. There’s lots! And by some really smart folks too. I find myself in exalted company!
Here are a few quotes and links that I really liked:
All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking. - Friedrich Nietzsche
Take a two-mile walk every morning before breakfast. - Harry Truman (Advice on how to live to be 80.)
Above all do not lose your desire to walk. Everyday I walk myself into state of well being and walk away from every illness. I have walked myself into my best thoughts and I know of no thought so burdensome hat one cannot walk away from it… if one keeps on walking everything will be alright. - Soren Kierkegaard
I can only meditate when I am walking. When I stop, I cease to think; my mind works only with my legs.” - Jean Jacques Rousseau, Confessions
Meandering leads to perfection. Lao Tzu
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. – Fred Allen
He who limps is still walking. - Stanislaw J. Lec
My father considered a walk among the mountains as the equivalent of churchgoing. - Aldous Huxley
Of all exercises walking is the best. - Thomas Jefferson
A fact bobbed up from my memory, that the ancient Egyptians prescribed walking through a garden as a cure for the mad. It was a mind-altering drug we took daily. - Paul Fleischman, Seedfolks
Walking is the great adventure, the first meditation, a practice of heartiness and soul primary to humankind. Walking is the exact balance between spirit and humility. - Gary Snyder, The Practice of the Wild
Our true home is in the present moment. To live in the present moment is a miracle. The miracle is not to walk on water. The miracle is to walk on the green Earth in the present moment… - Thich Nhat Hanh
Before supper take a little walk, after supper do the same. - Erasmus
A vigorous five-mile walk will do more good for an unhappy but otherwise healthy adult than all the medicine and psychology in the world. - Paul Dudley White
The sum of the whole is this: walk and be happy; walk and be healthy. The best way to lengthen out our days is to walk steadily and with a purpose. - Charles Dickens
.It is solved by walking. - A Latin proverb
Our way is not soft grass, it’s a mountain path with lots of rocks. But it goes upward, forward, toward the sun. - Ruth Westheimer
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven today and we don’t know where the hell she is.” - Ellen Degeneres
When you have worn out your shoes, the strength of the shoe leather as passed into the fiber of your body. I measure your health by the number of shoes and hats and clothes you have worn out.- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you are seeking creative ideas, go out walking. Angels whisper to a man when he goes for a walk. - Raymond Inmon
